Internal Dialogues: The Golden Voice Inside My Head

Being an introverted intuitive, I tend to have a lot of internal dialogues in many situations that require me to make a decision as to what I’m going to do or feel about it. Although it may cause me to decide slower than the average people but usually it helps me deal with the consequences more effectively.

As defined by Wikipedia, the dialogical self is a psychological concept which describes the mind’s ability to imagine the different positions of participants in an internal dialogue, in close connection with external dialogue. The “dialogical self” is the central concept in the Dialogical Self Theory (DST), as created and developed by the Dutch psychologist Hubert Hermans since the 1990s.

Of course there are times when internal dialogues become negative, that was when you need to consciously filter what is useful and what is not. You need to make sense of what you’re telling yourself. If it’s not going to do you any good, ignore it. Many times we unconsciously place unseen obstacles or instill unnecessary fear to do something. That will only paralyze us and hinder us from achieving something we want.

For example, I’ve always have this internal conflict about learning. I enjoy learning new things and sometimes I get so obsessed with the learning I could spend days and nights reading about it, asking people about it and stuck in front of my laptop, researching about it. Then there’s this voice inside of me asking, “What’s the purpose to all of this? Will this knowledge make you a living?” More often than not, the subjects that I’m most fascinated with can’t make me any money, at least not in my current situation. Then I’ll consciously tell myself that the purpose of learning is simply the satisfaction of knowing and I see no harm to it.

Another way of how I effectively use internal dialogues is when I’m in conflicts with others. It doesn’t matter whether or not I make it known to the other person that I’m frustrated with them. The internal dialogue where my “other self” tries to understand the issues from another perspective would have started right away. If it makes sense to me, I “cease fire” and not having to confront the person. But if it doesn’t make sense to me, I would want to confront the person and be honest about the situation.

If you’re prone to self talk, just know that you’re not alone and it’s not a bad thing!